This post is about to go deep, real deep.
The last time I posted on Tuesday, that was a rough day. Can I just be vulnerable with you for a moment?
I found myself driving on the way to school and I just burst out in tears. I’m sure everyone who passed me on the road thought I was crazy. I had some heavy stuff weighing on me and finally I had just reached the breaking point and the dam opened.
We’re all made to love, and we crave love. There are certain relationships in my life, family relationships and people that I know are not going to change, no matter how hard I will it. It will truly have to be the hand of God that changes the people, the situation and circumstances, and not my own hands. I have a VERY hard time letting go of things and hold tighter than ever to the burden of it all. The Lord says his yoke is easy, and his burden is light.
Get that through your thick head, Lauren.
So, I sat in my car with the tears falling down my cheeks, I verbally say out loud… “Lord, take this, because I can’t do it anymore. “ That was the most freeing moment.
I’ve also come to realize that when it comes to family, and any relationships, when we are choosing to live a life for Christ and your value and belief systems do not align with theirs, it’s a struggle. A big struggle. A hard struggle.
I knew the day I chose to live a life for Christ, follow after him, seek him, and live a life pleasing to him, that it wasn’t going to be easy. Actually, following Christ is probably one of the hardest things we’ll ever have to do. With that said, it’s one of the easiest things to do and the reward is SO great.
I know I have been set apart as a child of God, as his daughter. And I’m daily trying to see and view myself as such and find the value in that. No earthly love or acceptance can match the love and acceptance we have in the knowledge that we are his. God chose me. He saw those tears. He saw me in the car driving that day and counted those tears.
You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in Your book”
(Psalm 56:8, NLT)
And along with that knowledge comes everything the world, people, and Satan like to throw our way. He says in this world we will have trials and tribulation, but take heart, because he has overcome the world. Amen for that!!
I guess I could have bypassed all this and summed this post up in one sentence…
Sometimes you just need a good cry!
1 hour ago